She'll get as many combat boots and tennis shoes as she wants, thank you. Just be grateful they aren't heels with sharp points to step on your feet with.
She's not really sure how to take his 'long moment,' but it seems to be over, thankfully. Clothes shopping is painful enough without him making it weird. "We'll be home soon with lots of alcohol and the promise of steak later. Your back will be fine."
Whether he wants to sit and wait or not, she's back out on the store floor to grab more tops and find shoes that fit.
Heels with sharp points would be lighter! "And then maybe you can model some lingerie for me," he adds after her with a waggle of his eyebrows. Okay, some plain bras don't really count as 'lingerie', but they're what she's got, and she'd be hot in next to nothing. Almost as hot as being in nothing at all.
She snorts. "That's not happening unless you're going to pay me for it." Because that's not something she's spending her money on. Besides, the 'lingerie' in this store is pitiful.
His pile grows larger as she moves through the store and it'll take her a moment to figure out her shoe size again.
"Wha--hey! No, no, that is a thing for just me. The two of us. And nobody else gets to take your bras off, okay? Nobody gets to share your ass. I will tattoo 'property of Church' on there if I have to." Look at his silly puppy grin. Yeah, as if she would ever be his property and as if he could ever stop her from doing anything at all.
She would hit him for that tattoo comment if it weren't so farfetched. Like that would ever happen.
"Keep talking like that and I might have to go do it on principle. I wonder which one would be easier for York to take off," she teases. Not that she's ever thought about her best friend like that, but she knows what buttons to press to rile Church up.
"What, no, come on, you just want to see him pound me into the ground, which, y'know, you kind of already saw. Nobody gets to beat me that hard but you."
Oh come on, he needs those arms, okay! "How about we compromise here. How about you don't test that out, and I'll figure out how to carry all this shit and the food and the booze. And show off my big strong manly muscles."
"If you can keep your muscles working beyond that then yeah, I'll compromise." She is paying for everything after all and this trip will make a dent in her funds.
Please, like she can't make that back easily enough, especially if her partnership with York keeps on being lucrative. That's a thing he won't complain about with York. "Are we done here, because, y'know, bags will make this a hell of a lot easier. Unless you got some girly dresses you need to twirl around in first."
"Yeah, yeah we can go. I need a drink after listening to you all day." Or a few. She'd see how she felt once they got home. She leads the way to the register and manages to hold back a cringe when they're told the total. Yeah, she's going to need another job pretty quick.
"Oh bitch whine moan complain, you know you love it." Well. Love him. Not actually love the listening to him being an asshole all day. But that's kind of not a phrase they say to each other.
Bags are much easier to carry. On the other hand, he wishes Caboose were around to carry everything, that guy was such a god damn tank for being the gentlest being he'd ever met.
"I'd love it more if you carried everything quietly." That last word being key."Better keep up, it's a few blocks to other store." The location of this store may or may not have been intentionally farther away than needed. She's not telling.
"Make me." Oh that's bad but he won't take it back. Such a smartass grin on his face. Don't worry, his super strong muscled man arms can take the strain. (He's going to hate every single cell of his stupid fucking human body tomorrow, but that's tomorrow.)
She's well aware that what she's about to do will not make him be quiet and she's waiting a beat to make sure there's not much of an audience. Subtly, she lets him walk a couple steps in front of her so it's much easier for her to attempt to jump onto him, piggy-back style. He thought the bags were bad, let's see how he feels about this.
In true Church fashion, he doesn't notice until it's too late, Tex leaping up onto his back and throwing him off. There's a long, drawn-out moment where it looks like he might just tip right over onto both of their faces, but he recovers at the last second. "What the fuck!"
It does leave him bent over, from the weight and from making sure she doesn't fall right off. (Mostly the former.) "Shit, you weigh a ton! Ever think about going on a diet, you crazy bitch?"
Mission successful. Making fun of her weight is not going to make her get off any sooner and once it appears he's not going to tip over any second, she settles in. She isn't going to stay there too long, but hell if this isn't too funny to keep up for at least a little bit.
"Hold on, your fat ass is gonna break my back--" He'll readjust his arms so they're up and under her legs to support her. It keeps him from being bent near horizontal anyway.
"Y'know, when we decided I was being your pack mule, I don't think it included you." Whew. He's fine he's got this. Yep. Talking doesn't help but by god he's not going to stop now. "Does it look like I'm saddled up? Fuck, that sounds like something Donut would say."
She snickers and gives his side a pat before trying to get down. Fun's over and she doesn't really want him to be too sore. She doesn't need him passing out after one shot.
"Not saddled yet," she teases in a low voice. "You will be when we get home."
...Yeah, he likes the sound of that. That'll be the good kind of sore. Despite his protests, he's now a-okay with the piggybacking and carrying everything and letting her down and everything going on right now.
Hey, he's a guy, sometimes he's very simple to figure out.
"Then let's get this over as fast as possible." Nobody ever accused Church of having an abundance of patience.
She's well aware of how simple he can be and is not afraid to use that to her advantage. And okay, maybe sex is fun, too, and she wouldn't mind having more of it now that they have bodies.
"You don't have to tell me twice. Sooner we get home with the drinks and steak, the better." As soon as they make it to the store, she's bee-lining for the alcohol.
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She's not really sure how to take his 'long moment,' but it seems to be over, thankfully. Clothes shopping is painful enough without him making it weird. "We'll be home soon with lots of alcohol and the promise of steak later. Your back will be fine."
Whether he wants to sit and wait or not, she's back out on the store floor to grab more tops and find shoes that fit.
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His pile grows larger as she moves through the store and it'll take her a moment to figure out her shoe size again.
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"Keep talking like that and I might have to go do it on principle. I wonder which one would be easier for York to take off," she teases. Not that she's ever thought about her best friend like that, but she knows what buttons to press to rile Church up.
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Bags are much easier to carry. On the other hand, he wishes Caboose were around to carry everything, that guy was such a god damn tank for being the gentlest being he'd ever met.
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It does leave him bent over, from the weight and from making sure she doesn't fall right off. (Mostly the former.) "Shit, you weigh a ton! Ever think about going on a diet, you crazy bitch?"
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"Shut up and keep walking."
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"Y'know, when we decided I was being your pack mule, I don't think it included you." Whew. He's fine he's got this. Yep. Talking doesn't help but by god he's not going to stop now. "Does it look like I'm saddled up? Fuck, that sounds like something Donut would say."
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"Not saddled yet," she teases in a low voice. "You will be when we get home."
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Hey, he's a guy, sometimes he's very simple to figure out.
"Then let's get this over as fast as possible." Nobody ever accused Church of having an abundance of patience.
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"You don't have to tell me twice. Sooner we get home with the drinks and steak, the better." As soon as they make it to the store, she's bee-lining for the alcohol.
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